May 2013
2 posts
May 12, 2009
I’ve written about this day a thousand and one times i believe, but its just like a book that continues to be written; this day hasn’t become another day of the year. This is the most life changing day of my life thus far. All my thoughts on life and love changed that day. I never understood all these love stories and felt that what they portrayed was all fictional in fact I felt...
Oh may.
that crazy month where everyone begins to feel excited. people begin to smell hope..crazy as it may sound May is just May. May means mothers day which might sound corny; should be everyday. May means only one more month till summer. quite personally i hate summer and everything that comes along with that dreadful season. sweaty people rubbing up against sweatier people. unbearable heat, the very...
March 2013
4 posts
NAKED WOMEN ARE AN ART, BUT POSTING UP 4035I340I064I304634 PICTURES OF NAKED WOMEN IS JUST SAD.
.ahemmmmmm
sometimes i wonder when people die where do they actualloy go i mean their spirits like i always talk about the mean things i would do to people once i was dead like you know scare them. lmao but i dont know whqat the actual rules for death are like do we get a few days to harrass people or do we just stop exsisting right away. i nwould really like to iknow that like you know jhust in case i die....
dont wana close my eyes dont wana fall asleep, cause i’d miss you babe…..and i dont wana miss a thing.
February 2013
1 post
posting stuff here has become so un important, when before it was the only way i could find alittle comfort. today ive had alot of thoughts about alot of things. all along i believed i would find you…seems nice i thought things could just work themselves out like usual but there only so many re do’s in life and i guess i have re done it one too many times.thought number two..what...
January 2013
2 posts
my life has been put to the challenge…i dont really know what to do anymore. my life use to be driven by a goal the goal is still there but things are getting in the way. im tired of being alone tired of feeling empty and i know what could fill that void…but i dont know if doing it is the right thing. moving to a new country, going to a new school finding a new job; its alot of...
I miss my mom so much. It hurts doing all the things i did with her alone. I have to wait a whole eleven months to see her. Living this life gets harder and harder each time i see her then have to leave. Its not just seeing her its my dad and my brothers as well. My life is splattered between two polar opposite countries. I hate this feeling its so cold and lonely, the people i do live with are...
December 2012
4 posts
i’ll love you till the sunrises.
no longer then that…
i love my dad i really do…but i dont want to see him i feel like it will take time for me to be ok with what hes done. his stay in rehab gave me the time and space that i needed from him..thing is ive ben told im a bad person for not wanting to see him. i honestly dont believe so becasue one can forgive just never forget. who am i really to forgive no one
i know.
I look back and wonder why
ever time i saw you i didnt try
you were the best
frankly much better then the rest
you waited for three years or so
even after i said no
i hooked you on for false hope
and when you were ready i was guna say, yea right you dope!
man how i miss that
how i’d be so silent yet there you sat
admiring god knows what?
i miss you and i miss all of that.
so dont...
November 2012
5 posts
its just my fault
how long is too long. i believe that not giving up is a virtue. i believe it’s what gives you strength to continue…but how long is too long?
I simply didnt want to loose you but now i just wish you would leave me and never come back. i dont need you nor do i actually want you in my life. still there is a part of me that doesnt let you go…i miss you so badly half the time and I...
Forever..i never thought it exsisted and im not saying every movie i watch is like reality to me because it clearly isnt. but forever sounds pretty comforting. knowing that for all eternity you’ll be with the one person who showed you how to live. the person that made your heart come alive…it seems hard to believe in forever and even harder to believe in never. but somehow i believe...
so what if the love you thought was gone suddenyl came back? just showed up randomly and knock on your door…would you let i back in or be smart enough to know it was no good the first time. why are there so many hellos and so many goodbyes but no real resolution,no happily ever after, no happily never after. just a endless cycle of unanswered question and unspoken fears. love is a bit...
i dont wana love if its not you :)
October 2012
8 posts
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well i kinda figured act like the times aint changing and that may just work out. but it doesnt where not the people we were a year or two ago. so even if you make me feel like a kid again im not. wishful thinking has resulted to be useless in the past hense it is now. i like you better when your far away because when your in reach you become a real dick all over again. makes me sad though i musnt...
the sensation i have is killing me. the touch, the feel, the effervesensce. its all mind controlling. deen rouy hcuot.
thankgod after so long he finally understood what virginity is about and why it is so damn important. because havent you ever regreted loossing yours? maybe should of waited a little longer, maybe the person was all wrong. but what good is that now if your first time is gone. making love is not just hot sex its unifying your body soul and mind with someone you are emotionally devoted to. the day i...
i know i said i was done..but love songs have started to make sense to me again. so maybe im not done loving yet maybe i just dont have someone to love. so yea im not done.
i hate to think that some people dont find what they are looking for because they dont bother searching. well leading to my basic point i feel like somethings missing but i dont know what it is so how can i find it. i think...
September 2012
14 posts
once you let go of dirty love, your heart can open up for the highest love of all pure love…then kind you hoped for your whole life.
I wish people in our lives had the no matter whatness quality. As human beings we make several thousand mistakes throughout our growth and development. some mistakes cause chaotic responses others not so much, but regardless all mistakes catch up with us. Ok I’m begining to digress point is I wish no matter what we did people would 100percent stand by us. Sometimes we make the kinds of...
fridayROUTINE....
friday nights.this is a sad sad fact of life i must admit. for the past two years my friday nights consist of a movie marathon followed by a road down memory lane and some sleeep. not very glamorous you see. i mean generally i love weekends like staurdays are great. but friday it feels like by the time i get home everyone has got a plan and i have no ryhme or reason. this falls under the routine...
its been a not so productive day.
Medley of the best songs ever...in my opinion
if you search for tenderness it isnt hard to find,you could have the love you need to live. if you look for truthfulness you might just as well blind. everyone is so untrue. honesty is hardly ever heard.
turn around every now and then i get alittle bit lonely.
every now and then i get alittle bit nervous that the best of my years have gone by.
and when you rise at the morning sun, and you come...
carlos javier gaitan villon
my big brother is 100000 percent my idol. he is someone i look up to. someone i trust.
i admire his drive
his passion
his strength
his personality
his wit
his humor
i admire the person he is
i love the way he makes a rainy day seem bright, how he makes me smile my troubles away. we could be falling to our death and he’d be telling me a joke. he makes me feel special ya know im his...
METAMORPHISIS
IVE SUCCEEDED..MY tittles are misguiding
as the young adult im becoming ive been changing my outlook on life and love. but today ill start with love. i have loved and loved and loved some more. everyone ive been with i have thought ive loved.. but what is true is that ive finally learned to difference love and obsession. but here it is, ive only fell in love once..i fell in love with a boy a met in 8th grade he was a year younger. ok...
Lying
you know a lie follows another lie and so on..when you begin to lie you dont necessarily realize your buying into to the nasty little game. one lie hides the truth another lie hides that lie that hid the truth and so forth. once you lie you surely can not stop because life has become a whole lot easier. you can say and do as you please and along the way you become a pro at this,untill BAM.you...
NOT GOING BACK.
a long time ago i was so scared, scared of what life was suppose to be or what it would be. i was so scared of everything that surrounded..i feared loosing everything i had myself included. all i thought was why is life so damn sad..but along the way i realized i had just wasted time seeing life through dirty glasses; thinking everything was so horrible. i lost a lot in the process. i became...
ME ENAMORE
de ti como nunca lo avia hecho antes. y cada vez q las cosas cambian y me olvido algo te trae de vuelta a mi vida. te ame mucho mas de la cuenta. y realmente te amare por siempre. aveces quisiera abrasarte para saber q es lo q siento cuando estoy contigo. quisiera verte para poder entender q ya no eres lo que quiero y mucho menos lo q necesito. pero ahora tu estas tan lejos de mi.,somos como el...
i wana think of an adventure we go on. a journey we could take on. i wana know that amazing things happen in a blink of an eye. cause baby ya changed my life for good. im the type of happy i never understood.
the love i knew before could never match up.
i never feel guilty or wana give up.
August 2012
25 posts
Your bad judgment is your problem, not mine.
climbing down the wal the wall of misfortune.
as in awakening for the deep slumber we call death.
ripping my soul to shredds.
as in being who i am and who i am is what im not. and i am not who iam.
being dealt with the test of time
as in evolving into a repugnent creature that calculates every minute in everyday.
peeling of a layer of soul, a metamorphisis of sorts
as in cruel and ruthless...
HAPPYSUNDAY
i miss my granmaaa.
im watching arthur and lifes a bore.
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
But they weren’t the same. No one ever is when they’ve been tickled by first and...
You cannot save people. You can only love them.
Mothers come in different shapes
A mom I sure did want
But about it I was nonchalant
I searched and search since mine had left
I was even capable of theft
Mom where was she to be?
If the pain and sorrow was all I could see
My mom left me high and dry
And as four year olds I’d cry
So I wander these streets
In fear of wetting my bed sheets
But little did I know
That my “mom” just would not show
...